The unmet wounds of unworthiness
At some point in your life, usually before the age of 7 or 8, you would have experienced not getting what u needed.
You needs weren't met.
Your voice wasn't heard.
Your work wasn't seen.
Your hugs weren't welcome.
And you felt unworthy.
As your grew into your intellectual nature, leaving behind your mother tongue language of intuition, and entered the world of social influence, this unworthiness became fortified with a sense of undeserving.
So now, not only are you feeling like you're not worthy, you are also undeserving - shame, punishment and self-depreciation now start to take over.
And what was once a simple childhood memory, now becomes a negative point of reference for every single thought, feeling or emotion in your life.
This emotional experience of unworthiness eventually becomes so unpleasant, so unbearable, that we become unconscious - we start to tune out.
We start to develop addictions - unconscious relationships with substances, people or habits that will either numb, distract or get us so high we forget the 'real pain'.
Then, when that's not enough to distract us, we move from our own lives into the lives of others.
We start to get busy being in other people's business - criticising, controlling, pleasing or perfecting other people's lives in the absence of any control in our own.
Every behaviour that doesn't bring joy or happiness into your life has, at its root, the foundation of feeling unworthy.
We eat because we feel bad.
We drink because we feel low.
We gossip because we feel abandoned.
We interfere because we feel unheard.
We seek validation, acknowledgement & praise because we are disconnected from our own sense of brilliance.
We perfect, please and perform because we have forgotten the origin of our own divine perfection.
All the while, our true nature lies buried within; hidden underneath all the layers of shame, judgement and unhappiness that the ego has laid upon it over the years.
Until one day, a wake up call.
A cheating husband.
A fortune lost.
An unshakable sadness.
Something wakes you up and makes you realise that, you are indeed living unconsciously, and destroying your essential self in the process.
Then something catches your attention.
A blog post.
Something reignites the spark, speaks the language of your soul.
Reminds you that, even in your suffering, nothing of true value has been lost. And we can begin the journey to finding our truest self once more.
Don't be fooled. The journey is never easy. Those wounds of unworthiness have been festering unattended for a long, long time.
But the gift that is to become your prize?
The joy at recreating a life that is full of health, happiness and grace?
It is unspeakable. Indescribable. It is indeed priceless.
And worth every bit of healing that you will need to offer your broken, forgotten body on the way back home to yourself.
So today I ask you to stop and pause, and ask yourself - what unmet wound is trying to get your attention in your life?
Where are you not listening to yourself?
Where are you not honouring yourself?
Where are you still believing more in your unworthiness, than in your magnificence?